What a roommate!
I had just bought a house and needed some help to pay the monthly mortgage. Llewellyn was in the process of hiring David as an editor and moving him up from Texas. Carl suggested that I consider David for a roommate. I had worked with him on a book project and was much in awe of him.
However, I didn’t know what he would be like to live with. When he went out for groceries and came back with several cans of cat food, I knew he was a kind person.
We had so much fun in the past 22 years. He was my best friend, my mentor, my business partner, and helpful caretaker of all the animals when I had to travel. Our nightly fun grudge matches playing Scrabble will live on in infamy. We shared a love of opera and a fascination with Mozart. We learned about Kage Baker and her wonderful books. David had a massive collection of books that would rival a public library. He had volumes on almost every subject, carefully arranged for easy study. His vast storehouse of ready knowledge and amazing ability to grasp the gestalt of a situation or article was incredible.
He wasn’t supposed to leave us this soon. We had season tickets to the St. Paul Chamber Orchestra, and had a Caribbean cruise planned in January. His last day was spent with us running errands around town. The weather was marvelous. Our good friend Darcy arrived on that day, and we had a lovely dinner together at home. David and I walked the dogs in the wetlands where we have a rustic path. It was dark and he was pointing out constellations, all of which he knew. We came back, I went to bed to read and he sat down in his rocking chair, intending to listen to music or watch TV. A couple of hours later, I saw that his light was on and went to ask him to shut his door or turn off his light. He was sleeping in his rocking chair. Only it was the long sleep. He looked very peaceful, head back, and arms resting on the chair arms. He has left a deep void, but was much loved.
Dead Is?Not Dead
David Godwin’s passing was sudden and unexpected. I don’t think it was in his plans either.
It was a shock and surreal that whole night with paramedics, police, the medical examiner all coming and going in my home. I was of course sleep deprived and in shock. Maybe because of that I was able to “see” David’s spirit accompanying his body when the medical examiner took his body in the ambulance to the morgue.
However, the next morning the dogs had to go for their usual constitutional walk. I could hear a word over and over in my head. It was like someone was above my shoulder, talking to me. The word was “Thelema.” It finally dawned on me that Thelema was Aleister Crowley’s system of magic. Editor Sue Stein helped me, and we did some research. We eventually figured out it was David’s password for his email program! It had all the Fate contacts, articles, and information on it needed to continue with the magazine.
Later that afternoon I went into the garage, and opened the refrigerator door there to have a beer. I could hear David behind me saying, “No fair.” I guess one can’t enjoy a brew in spirit.
On January 22, 2013, he was definitely present in my kitchen. Many times I had forgotten to celebrate David’s birthday. How ironic now that he was dead, I remembered it! Feeling his presence always makes me cry, so it was a doubly challenging, sad day. I had to put down my Siamese feline companion of 22 years, Punk, that day, and David was here to help in Punk’s transition. I could feel him in the car going to the vet’s, and in the office when Punk was euthanized. I’m sure they are hanging out together in spirit.
The first few months were filled with grief, shock, and loneliness. Now, however, it is much more comfortable to reach out and communicate with David, either with a medium or psychic, or if I’m in a quiet space I can talk to him directly and hear what he has to say. It’s pretty cool to have one’s own guardian angel, who is very familiar and not threatening at all.
Thanks to some wonderful people who provided help and those who were able to contact David and relay what was happening to him. Mediums Meg McPherson and Julia Assante were especially clear and direct in their communications. Julia said that David had created an English style country cottage and was with some like-minded philosophical friends.
Coincidentally, many books on the afterlife, life after death, have fallen into my hands in the past few months. I have always had a curiosity about what it’s like on the other side. I have also had a morbid fear of death, but with David’s passing, I now feel totally open to experience all the communication possible. Sometimes I have been able to tune into that frequency and see friends and relatives who have passed on. They always seem happy and are smiling or laughing. I wonder what the cosmic joke is?